This Just In

Are you asking yourself, "Do I have swine flu???"


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This Is Why It's Happening

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Today’s Topic – Cops And Unrelated To Cops, Rides

Check out these (gay?) cops. They’ve got a box ‘o helmets and they're stopping the dudes, hugging them, and giving them a helmet – a nice helmet at that. They don’t seem to do this with the chicks – hence my wonderment if they’re gay or not. Not that there is anything wrong with that.


Why, oh why, don’t we see this here in the States or even my fair city??? Are you feeling as deprived as I am?

OK, onto the rides part of this malarkey. I’m thinking of setting up two (2) for 2010 – since I’ll be sticking closer to home most all of 2009.

There’s been talk of running a Faces to the Falls ride from the Black Hills of South Dakota (Mt. Rushmore, the “Faces” part, get it?) to Sioux Falls, SD (Falls Park, real water falls, the “Falls” part, get that?). Some might do this yet this year. I’m out for this year. However, I’m thinking next year might fit well. This would likely be a small group of rollers. Advertising would be word of mouth only and the full particulars have not been dreamed up – yet.

Secondly, I’d like to do a long two (2) day ride over a weekend in the summer. I’d call this one “Vision Quest with Snakebite” or something like that. The ride would be one hundred sixty (160) miles on a Saturday from Sioux Falls, SD to Oacoma, SD (just over the Missouri River from Chamberlain) on Saturday and then one hundred sixty (160) miles back on Sunday.

I did this ride about one (1) year ago as I was prepping for the Highway 212 Gut Check race. The route is flat –ish and most of the roads are not too heavily traveled. Again, this would be word of mouth advertising, no fees, no support, no nothing, just a long-ass, vision quest, type of ride. Come along if you want, don’t come if you don’t want. Think touring bikes for this one. You’d have to carry whatever you’d need with you since no support vehicles will be available or allowed. There are several pass through towns on this route to refill water bottles, buy junk food, and the like.

Anyway, way, way in advance “heads up.”


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What A Handsome Dude

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Today’s Topic – Prom? At Monk’s ?!? WTF?!?

Greetings buckaroos! Not much of a weekend for this dude. The weather was not here, wish you were beautiful. So, what did a dude do? Scouting trip.

The S.O. and I piled into her fossil fueled vehicle for a scouting trip to Yankton and Lewis & Clark Recreation Area. I’d never been. She’d never been. We went, we saw, and that’s it.

There may, or may not, be bike camping excursions that far. It’s a nice place, right on the Missouri River, just above a damn dam.

Once back we’d dined and were sitting around minding our own business when the kErnEl calls beckoning us to Monk’s. You can call me late for dinner but you’ll never have to call me twice to go to Monk’s. Away we did stroll.

We found the kErnEl there, chaperoned by Dr. Dope, sitting at the bar. We sidled up and ordered. The place was quite full and full of people dressed way too nicely. (The comment was made, “Who are these people and what are they doing in my bar?”)

They must have been wedding go-er to-ers or something, but looked like they were either headed to, or coming from, The Prom. I have to admit, I get a big grin on my face when some dip-shit tries to order a bud light or a miller light only to be told, “We don’t sell that crap here.”

On a sad note, Monk’s is out of Bacon (a.k.a. Surly Smoked Porter). It’s a seasonal, it’s gone, come come back in the fall if you want that. I had a Surly Bender followed by a Black Albert. Holy crap was the Black Albert ever good! Dangerous in many ways, too. Tastes good, goes down very smooth, and is around thirteen percent (13%) alcohol (I think about that. Manny? Manny? Can you hear me? Perhaps you can provide the vital statistics for this beer.).

I had something else to report, but, for the life of me, can’t remember what it was. I guess that was important. Oh well, time to make like an alligator and drag my ass out of here.


Ride On.

Friday Afternoon Grab Bag

Do you have a butt? Race it!

Is this Sov in disguise?

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Today’s Topic – Action Plan And Trouble

Some of the bicycle advocacy things happening in my fair city seem to be heating up. Most of these items stem from a pending major construction project.

We’ve got all sorts of shit going down, here. Our city has a bike path that makes a nineteen (19) mile loop around the city. A lot of this path runs along the Big Sioux River. Some of it goes on top of a levee system. Starting this year part of this levee system is going to be raised closing a major north/south biking corridor.

In this the City has provided an alternate route to get bikers around the construction. In a couple of instances this new route, on City streets, comes to intersections with stop lights. At one (1) of the lights the sensitivity has been changed such that rollers can set it off.

I tested this light and reported it worked well. In this report I suggested it would be a really, really good idea if ALL city lights had their sensitivities changed. That’s when the shit started to hit the fan on this part of the whole sordid affair.

Emails started to fly from bikers. A few City people, including a cop, responded. The response from the City people, including the cop, raised some hackles.

Another part of this project raises a bridge several feet. This will be done in two (2) parts. The east travel section and then the west travel section (or vice-versa, it doesn’t matter). In this, there are NO provisions for pedestrian or bicycle traffic to cross during the two (2) year construction project. Alternate crossing to the south is about one (1) mile, by the direction the crow flies, and to the north about three (3) miles. To a vehicle driver, no biggie. To a roller or ped, a VERY biggie.

To add insult to injury the game plan is for the replaced bike path to be down the levee slope on a step, instead of on top as it is now. In non snow / ice months, no problem. During snow / ice months HUGE problem. Our City cannot seem to get it there are more and more of us who commute by bike year ‘round. They are not seeing biking is so much more than a recreational activity.

To shorten this already longer story – there’s much more to this story. Several of us are doing everything we can to get things fixed, one (1) step at a time.

I fear that things are going to get pretty ugly by the time this is over. And when it is over, it might not be completely over. There’s trouble a brewin’…..


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Thursday Evening Bonus

Don't Ram The Boobs!!!

EMBED-Don't Ram the Boobs - Watch more free videos

And THIS one is the best yet!



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Today’s Topic – Tweed Is The Ride

I received an email from Da' Square Wheelman pointing out a bike event that appears to be exceptionally cool and fun.



If you’re going to be in Chicago on May 2nd, here’s the info:

Inspired by The London Fixed-Gear and Single-Speed Forum's Tweed Run and challenged by San Francisco's Thursday Tweed Ride, I would like to announce the 1st Annual Winston's Tweed Ride! This celebration of herringbone, hip flasks, and our noble steeds will be hosted by British Bicycles of Chicago, or the BBC.

Everyone is invited! If you have a Brit bike, do ride. If you don't, but enjoy tweedy elegance, do ride. If you do both, CERTAINLY DO RIDE!!!



2 May 2009 marks the 80th anniversary of Winston Churchill’s invention of his exquisitely dry martini: gin poured over crushed ice while he observed the vermouth from across the room. The route, designed by the Right Honorable Lee Diamond, is 10 civilized miles meandering past (and into) some of The Windy City's most infamous (and still open) speakeasies. Where else but in these lively establishments would the ladies & gents find more bracing refreshments and hearty victuals?

As with our fellow tweed runs, we hope to offer small, but significant, prizes for

Most Dapper Chap

Most Snappy Lass

Most Stylish Noble Steed

Most Inspired Interpretation of Tweediness

Best Mustache
(open to both lads and inventive lasses)

I wish I were going to be in Chicago for this event. Please pass the word.


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Today’s Topic – Earth Day

Hello and welcome to Earth Day. You know, I say from the top of my soap box, once the Earth’s natural resources are gone, they’re gone. Once the climate has had all the CO2 it can handle it changes – and not in a good way.

This picture has nothing to do with anything. Go figure.

I’d suggest selling, or at a minimum, parking, your damn vehicle and riding your bike. This means you.

If you want things, like the climate, the economy, your life, etc, better, than quit your whining and do something about it. Like riding your bike. Everyday. To work. Your kids will be done with school in a few weeks so you can’t use the “I have to take my kids to school” excuse like a crutch anymore.

What? You have to take them to day care? They’d love to either ride their bike with you or catch a ride on the back or be pulled in a kid trailer.

It’s Earth Day. Do something to save the planet.


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Today’s Topic – Brats

Last night was brat night at my place. My method of cooking consists of boiling the brats in pretty good ale and then browning them on the grill. Last night I used Summit Extra Pale Ale as the beer.

I ate my brats while consuming another Summit product, Maibock. Maibock is Summit’s May beer. They went well together.



As part of the experiment some Johnsonville, more or less standard, brats were cooked along with some Hy-Vee grocery store, from the meat counter, brats. The Hy-Vee ones won out hands down.

So far, I prefer my brats boiled in brown ale. Others are OK but brown ale, especially home brewed, seems to work best for me.

If you want, try this method of brat cooking. Let me know which beer you like to drink along with your brat consumption.

The next time I make brats I might try boiling them in Surly Coffee Bender. That sounds good. I wonder if it will taste good.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Wind, And Lots Of It

My normal commute time is about thirty (30) minutes each way with the Big Dummy. I nice amount of time to either, get my blood pumping in the morning, or burn off any work related stress on my way home.

Today the winds were tough. I think they were about twenty (20) MPH sustained with higher gusts. It took me forty-five (45) minutes to get to work. However, on the flip side, it should take me about fifteen (15) minutes to get home.

Ah, spring! Warmer temperatures and unrelenting wind. No worries, I’ll take it.

This morning I was doing my usual reading of Clusterfuck Nation. This weeks post include this.

We have to work very hard to reconfigure the physical arrangement of life in the USA, moving away from the losses of our suburbs, reactivating our towns, downscaling our biggest cities, re-scaling our farms and food production, switching out our Happy Motoring system for public transit and walkable neighborhoods, rebuilding local networks of commerce, and figuring out a way to make a few things of value again.

I’ve mentioned before I don’t always agree with what Kunstler says, but this is another post of his that I think he got exactly right. Though the times we live in might be frightening to some, I sure think they are interesting.

I wonder how many lessons will be available to learn, how many will actually be learned, and how long they will stick. Interesting times ahead, that’s for sure.


Ride On.

Friday Afternoon Grab Bag

Pig Chase

White Wedding

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Today’s Topic – Where It Came From

First of all, my whip, otherwise known as a riding crop, did not come from Sex World or the like. No, I wanted a real one, a sturdy one, and one that would last. I purchased my whip while touring around town looking for someplace that refills propane tanks. I bought mine from TSC (Tractor Supply Company – an ag supply store). These little gems are most used by barrel racers and Kentucky Derby racer types.

I was amazed at how many of you voiced your apprehensions (?) of me selling my road bike. It’s not like I won’t be riding on the road because I don’t have a road bike anymore – geez!!! It’s just that the thing isn’t being ridden much and if I go out on a road ride, it’s not my first choice of bikes to ride.

I do not feel a need to emulate (fill in the name of your favorite pro roadie here). Yes, sometimes the rush of going fast is fun, however, I get much more satisfaction by looking around at “stuff” than concentrating on the rear wheel of whoever is in the pace line. My life is not a race. The quicker I get to my biking destination, the quicker the ride is over.

It’s interesting. Not so long ago, while checking out a bike in a shop or someone’s new bike, I’d pick it up to see how light it was – thinking, lighter = better. Now when I pick up a bike and it feels light the first thought that runs through my mind is, “That doesn’t feel very substantial.” My mind being in full touring bike mode.

I attribute this change in my mind set by my lack of a motorized vehicle. Biking isn’t a novelty to me. Sure, I look forward to doing certain organized rides, but I don’t feel like it is the highlight of my week. I get to ride my (one (1) of my many) bike at least twice every day – to and from work. It is the best part of my day.

I don’t need the validation of riding with anyone else. Sometimes a one on one ride with someone is a great way to have a good conversation. Sometimes group rides are like that where you get to chat with a lot of people. Sometimes the solitude of a longer solo ride is the perfect time to think – or not.

So, for the time being, I’m going to be without a roadie bike. My tastes change with time, and, who knows? Maybe one (1) day I’ll end up with the latest and greatest plastic (carbon fiber) bike there is. In the meantime, I’ll be out enjoying my commute and loading up the Big Dummy for some longer rides and camping trips – at 12 to 15 MPH.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Implements Of Destruction

My roadie bike is for sale on Ebay. I’m tending toward not caring so much to go fast on a bicycle as just to have fun. Maybe I’ll get another roadie bike, maybe not, we’ll see. My preferences are toward riding a bike on dirt, or urban riding, and touring.

My touring bike, which is also my current commuter and grocery getter, is my Surly Big Dummy. While this bike has fast become one (1) of my favorites, it doesn’t accelerate very quickly and the top end (on flat, low wind stretches) isn’t too fast.

In my travels I encounter dogs now and then. Sometimes when they give chase, I goad them on – depending on the size and my perception of their intentions. Other times I can deter those who give chase by either yelling at them, squiring some water at them, or blowing a whistle (when I remember to bring one (1) along and have it ready).

There’s that one (1) dog in one-hundred (100) who’s big enough, fast enough, and intent enough, to want to take some of me home with it. For this dog I now carry Thee Implement Of Destruction.

Click For Big


Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a dog hater – quite the contrary. I very much like dogs. Until I’ve lived in an apartment I’ve always had one (1) for as long as I can remember. Thee Implement Of Destruction is my last resort, can’t deter the dog any other way, tool. With much touring in this area coming up in the form of bike camping, I want to be prepared. Chances are quite high I’ll never use it.

Road raged cage holes (assholes driving cars), on the other hand, I will not hesitate.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Visual Explanation Of How I Roll

I saw this incredibly good video over on Ecovelo. I’m posting it for you on here especially for those who cannot comprehend rolling stops, Idaho Stop Law, and how they relate to personal safety.


Bicycles, Rolling Stops, and the Idaho Stop from Spencer Boomhower on Vimeo.

That video is cooler than you! Anyway, there’s some visuals to explain to you how I roll now and how I will always roll. Your own personal safety is up to you. So, you do what’s best for you. I’m doing what’s best for me.

By the way, today is April 15th. Maybe you should start thinking about getting your income taxes done. Mine are done and the refund has been spent!


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – So, What Do You Think

I’ve been trying to pay attention to things like the economy and efforts to bring it out of recession. It’s looking more and more like General Motors is heading toward bankruptcy. “They” say this is probably a good thing and will enable G.M. to emerge stronger.

The economists who are not blowing smoke up your ass are saying things will not, and more importantly should not, go back to “the way things were.” I couldn’t agree more. Pre economic big slow down, the average American had huge credit card debt, was leasing a one (1) or more ( 2 +) vehicles instead of buying them such that they could be in a bigger, more luxurious gas guzzler than they could actually afford, and was facing the mother of all money shortfalls when their Adjustable Rate Mortgage (ARM) was having a balloon payment due.

As we come out of, or when we come out of, or if we come out of, this economic downturn, expect a more simple life. Or, to NOT go back to the way things were. Peak Oil, remember that? The concept that half of the oil in the world has been harvested and the second half is going to get harder and harder to get out of the ground, ring any bells? I don’t know if Peak Oil has happened or will happen, but don’t expect gas prices to hover around the $2.00 per gallon level for very long. Are you seeing the same increase in bike commuters I am? Just wait, that number should rise dramatically in the not-too-distant future. That’s one reason why it’s so important to fight for bike infrastructure now.

Also, do you remember green house gas emissions and how they’re fucking up the climate? Some scientists say its fact, others say its bullshit. My scientist can beat up your scientist, etc, etc. Where do you want to err here? Let’s say the scientists who say there IS green house gases fucking up the climate turn out to be wrong. What is the result of curbing CO2 emissions guessing they were right? Cleaner air, healthier people because they’re walking and biking, and healthier people because of the cleaner air. Now, let’s say the scientists who say global warming is bullshit are wrong. What’s the result if they are wrong and the climate is going to hell? We will have prudently done everything we could to reduce, or stop the spread of, or reverse global warming for something that happened to be true. Given these two (2) options, if you HAD to be wrong, which wrong would you want?

I guess the main point of this pointless ranting is one (1) should not expect life to go back to “the way things were” where everything is seemingly affordable, decisions had no consequences, and the earth’s resources will last forever.

Does this mean our way of life will greatly reduced? Not hardly. People are resilient and smart. Expect the return of home gardens, one (1) car per family, walking and bicycling for those errands that are within two (2) miles, and bicycling to work as the norm, not the exception. Who knows, maybe we’ll even see resurgence in reading books and going to the park. Wouldn’t it be a shame if people cut back their electrical usage in favor of exercise either physical or mental? Like I assert, I think people are smart and resourceful. Wouldn’t it be a grand day if the credit card companies went out of business due to lack of business because people saved up for something and paid cash for it? That would be cool.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Weekend Recap And Stuff

Although the weekend was a bit windy, it was warm(er). Saturday I managed to sleep in past the Coffee and Donut ride but hooked up with that MinusCar fellow and Adam in the Maul for coffee and a discussion about open houses. Speaking of the Maul, if you have to go to the Maul on a weekend, about 10:30 AM is pretty OK as the out-of-towners haven’t arrived yet and the maul rats are still in bed. Anyway, a good discussion was had and our Open House Presentation for Falls Area SingleTrack is moving forward.

Saturday afternoon the S.O. and I saddled up and headed mostly South into the brisk headwinds. Three (3) hours after we departed our domicile, we arrived in Canton, SD where we raided the convenience store’s stores of energy foods. The S.O. was beginning to doubt Canton even existed, but we found it.

The ride home took about ½ as much time as the ride down. A nice tailwind pushed us and the pedaling seemed effortless. We made it back to shower and dine and then make our way to Monk’s for some after meal liquid dessert.

Monk’s now has Surly 16 Grit on tap. I like it! It’s very hoppy and billed as a double IPA. The S.O. sampled the twenty five percent (25%) off Bad Elf something-or-the-other, which to my tastes was nearly as sweet as a barley wine. She liked it, I would never order it. I’ll get the 16 Grit again, though. I sampled it and also had some bacon (Surly Smoked Porter).

Sunday came and went uneventful. Not much shaking except getting ready for the week by getting groceries and stuff. A gym trip was made as well.

Also Sunday, we discussed upcoming ride destinations and bike camping. I’m thinking bike camping will start in earnest pretty soon. I’m expecting to do much of it this year. We’re going to add a rear rack and some sort of bags on the S.O.’s rig and I can haul much with the Big Dummy so we’re set.


Ride On.

Friday Afternoon Grab Bag

Iron Maiden Voyage

Damn. Looks like you gotta go HERE to see this video now.


Hey, Ladies! Mow your lawn!!!

Ride On.

Speaking of Portland…..

Wend magazine has a nice article regarding bike powered businesses their.

Jed Lazar doesn’t ride an average bike. Then again, he’s not riding it for average reasons. Although many of us don a helmet and mount our cycles in order to get to work, pick up groceries or just spend an afternoon outside, Lazar’s reason for cycling is all business. Co-founder of Soupcycle, Lazar rides his bike around the streets of Portland delivering handmade, organic soup. But because of a multitude of reasons, Lazar’s business isn’t the only one that’s harnessing the power of pedaling.

Reading farther in the article it mentions Florida, Boston, and Philadelphia as other places bike powered business have sprung up. Good on them.

We (Sioux Falls types) can look as close as Peace Coffee in Minneapolis to find a business that incorporates bicycles as a major part of their business.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Web Show And Movie

So, how about a little bicycle soap opera. Not the soap opera that is the Sioux Falls Bike Trail closure. No. A real soap opera. A year or two (2) ago there was a nearly weekly episode of “The Bicyclist.” The short (about five (5) minutes each) episodes are a continuing saga of twenty (20) somethings living in Portland, OR.

If you go the THE WEB SITE you can watch each episode. They are way on the right hand side of the page. Click them in order and watch to your hearts content. It’s pretty good for a low budget production.

The web based show became popular enough that they’ve made a movie. It will be premiered in Portland tonight. The trailer for the movie is right here:



Do you like it? The show and / or the movie, I mean. I’ve seen all episodes of the show and would like to see the movie. I’ll likely buy it once it’s on DVD and available. I wonder if I can talk the fine folks at Monk’s to show it on Sunday night movie night.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Recap Of Sorts

It was one week ago today that I was questioned by the heat. What did I do? Walked out of my apartment.

The S.O., a guest, and I left my apartment and there was the heat. The two (2) of them asked me my name and said they were looking for me (more on this later). I told them, they needed my ID, I gave it to them, and then they started asking me about my recent where-abouts. It seems they were looking for someone who wasn’t behaving properly at a local bar located about two (2) blocks North of where I live.

They couldn’t seem to get it through their skulls I wasn’t there (last time in that bar, oh, about FIVE years ago). They had me blow into an alcohol detector thingy (registered 0.0) and made phone calls and radio calls.

It turns out they were looking for someone who didn’t even match my description. Assholes.

Which brings me back to something. I told them my name and then they stated they were looking for someone with that name. They said they were looking for someone who was drunk and disorderly when an insider provided information they were actually looking for a sex offender who was at that bar with someone appearing to be pretty young and they were concerned about kidnapping.

So, lying to my face, phishing for info, yep, that’s the cops in my city. With the exception of taking liberties with traffic laws on my bike, I’m pretty much a law abiding citizen. I am guessing I’m not the only one who trusts law enforcement about half as far as they can throw them.

Next time, if there ever is a next time, I’ll know how to play the game better and my answers to their questions will be quite different.

But, on to happier times. This past weekend the S.O. and I escaped the bad weather here and were in Minneapolis. Friday night we arrived, ate at Brits, and after-dinner-drank at The Local.

Saturday we were up and at them early to make the Hiawatha Cyclery ride. The S.O. was a bit chilled by the time we got done riding to the ride. We borrowed some plastic bags for her feet and joined the other thirteen (13) rollers for the ride. The Full Monte was there Mr. Planetary Gears led. As usual the route was very pleasant, the group fun, and the over experience great.

Once done we made it back to the shop where we picked up some handlebars and grips for the S.O.’s bike. This followed her test riding several bikes. The one she liked best was already spoken for so we opted for alternate parts.

Saturday night we walked to One on One Bike Studio for Art Crank. The art itself was very good. We left with two (2) posters. One (1) of which will adorn my office and the other in the S.O.’s office. We ran into old friends and met a few new ones. The rain started in and we departed early for the dry confines of the hotel room.

Sunday was breakfast at Hell’s Kitchen, the new location. I must say, I prefer the old location much better. The new does have about three (3) times the room but the food quality has suffered. To accommodate more people I suspect some things are made ahead of time and then brought out. Certain items lacked that fresh-off-the-grill hotness.

Post breakfast I made a quick call to All The Way Ray. He was unable to attend the HC ride on Saturday and I wanted to catch up with him if I could. He indicated he and the missus were about to head downtown! They drove a bit and trained the rest of the way. We met them and walked to have coffee as we were awaiting the noon opening of Macy’s and the annual flower show.

We had no intention, or even knew about, attending the flower show. But, I was very impressed. It was on the eighth (8th) floor. Riding the escalator up was OK but when we hit the destination floor the unmistaken-able scent of fresh flowers was divine.

Post flower show we bid our farewells and scurried back home to find the snow waiting for us.

It was a great trip, Art Crank was awesome, the HC ride great as always, and fun was had by us.


Ride On.

Today’s Topic – Terrorism? Meh. How About Your Self

I was doing my usual morning scan of things on the internets that have at least a probability of being interesting and was directed to an article by John Goekler. The link to his article is HERE but below is the most of it.

A significant majority of Americans, polls repeatedly tell us, list terrorism as one of their greatest fears. Like most of our media-inspired interests and worries, however, this one has little basis in reality.

In actual fact, unless you’re serving in a war zone, the most dangerous person you’re ever likely to encounter – by several orders of magnitude – is the one you see in the mirror every morning.

Not some shadowy arms dealer peddling second hand nukes. Not some dusky Jihadi with a song on his lips and a suicide belt around his middle. Not some mad scientist, bribed by the forces of evil to cook up a bio-bug capable of ending life as we know it.
Here are the hard facts.

The single greatest killer of Americans is the so-called “lifestyle disease”. Somewhere between half a million and a million of us get a short ride in a long hearse every year because of smoking, lousy diets, parking our bodies in front of the TV instead of operating them, and downing yet another six pack and / or tequila popper.

According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, between 310,000 and 580,000 of us will commit suicide by cigarette this year. Another 260,000 to 470,000 will go in the ground due to poor diet and sedentary lifestyle. And some 85,000 of us will drink to our own departure.

After the person in the mirror, the next most dangerous individual we’re ever likely to encounter is one in a white coat. Something like 200,000 of us will experience “cessation of life” due to medical errors – botched procedures, mis-prescribed drugs and “nosocomial infections”. (The really nasty ones you get from treatment in a hospital or healthcare service unit.)

The next most dangerous encounter the average American is likely to have is with a co-worker with an infection. Or a doorknob, stair railing or restaurant utensil touched by someone with the crud. “Microbial Agents” (read bugs like flu and pneumonia) will send 75,000 of us to meet the Reaper this year.

If we live through those social encounters, the next greatest danger is “Toxic Agents” – asbestos in our ceiling, lead in our pipes, the stuff we spray on our lawns or pour down our clogged drains. Annual body count from these handy consumer products is around 55,000.

After that, the most dangerous person in our lives is the one behind the wheel. About 42,000 of us will cash our chips in our rides this year. More than half will do so because we didn’t wear a seat belt. (Lest it wrinkle our suit.)

Some 31,000 of us will commit suicide by intention this year. (As opposed to not fastening our seat belts or smoking, by which we didn’t really mean to kill ourselves.)
About 30,000 of us will die due to our sexual behaviors, through which we’ll contract AIDS or Hepatitis C. Another 20,000 of us will pop off due to illicit drug use.
The next scariest person in our lives is someone we know who’s having a really bad day. Over 16,000 Americans will be murdered this year, most often by a relative or friend.

After that, it’s an overdose on “non-steroidal anti-inflammatories”, acetaminophen or aspirin. About 7,600 hundred a year, perhaps due to the aftermath of those tequila poppers.

Next most dangerous thing is going to work. About 5,500 of us will buy the farm due to “occupational trauma”.

If that’s scary enough to skip work, we might want to skip lunch, too. Next most dangerous thing is the food we eat. About 5,200 of us will hurl our lives away due to “foodborne agents”.

Another 4,000 of us will drown. A significant percentage will be fishermen found floating with a high blood alcohol content and an unzipped fly.

As the data clearly shows, the things that genuinely threaten us are the ones we are most likely to ignore or simply accept. (We’re statistically far more likely to be killed by a lightning strike than by an action of Al Qaeda, for example.) The ones that we’re scared witless of – and spend trillions of increasingly scarce dollars to avert in our boundless paranoia – are less likely to harm us than a bag of peanuts. (Deaths in America due to peanut allergies average 50 – 100 per year.)

Deaths of Americans due to terrorist activities, according to the US State Department, have averaged less than 15 per year since 2002. And all of those occurred abroad. The majority were in Saudi Arabia, Egypt and the Occupied Palestinian Territories. (Civilian deaths in Iraq and Afghanistan were not counted due to the fact those occurred in war zones.)

Executive Summary:

The things we fear most may be least likely to occur, which means the time, trauma and treasure we invest in them is a complete waste.

Security itself is an illusion. It is a perception that exists only between our ears. No army, insurance policy, hazmat team, video surveillance or explosive sniffer can protect us from our own immune system, a well-intentioned but clumsy surgeon, failing to look before crossing the street, an asteroid randomly hurtling through space or someone willing to die in order to do others harm.

In this sense, the only things that can truly make us more “secure” are not things. They are the courage to face whatever comes with dignity and intention, and the strong relationships that assure we will face the future together, and find comfort and meaning in doing so.

Imagine, then, what might happen if we simply quit listening to the scaremongers and those who profit from our paranoia. Imagine what the world could look like if we made a conscious choice to live out whatever time we have with courage, compassion, service and joy.

Terrorism is an act of the weak. But so is walking through the airport in our socks.

We can make better choices.

Pretty good, huh? I liked it and was feeling in a giving mood so I thought I’d share.

In other noise I will expound my experiences with local law enforcement on Thursday evening and also the good times in Minneapolis this past weekend tomorrow. Hold your breath………..



Ride On.

Friday Afternoon Grab Bag

Electro-Shock Therapy Is So Last Year

Future Vikings Punter

Ride On.

Tonight - Bacon

Tonight I have a bike related meeting at Monk's House of Ale Repute. But, that's not what I want to talk about. Monk's is one of the few places, outside of the Twin City Metropolitan area (and a few others), to carry most all Surly beers on tap.

When I go there and slide up to the bar, one (1) of the girls asks me, "What'll I have?" I just need to say, "Bacon." They bring me (and anyone who says that) a Surly Smoked Porter every time.

Sweet.


Ride On.

April Fooling Around

Ride On.